Sermon Idea: Praying, “forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors,” means seeking God’s pardon for our sins and the power to forgive those who’ve sinned against us.
Introduction: More often than not, good preaching begins with an illustration that sets up a key question or central point the sermon develops. It is meant to pique interest and curiosity. It is meant to grab the attention of those listening, so that you can keep them engaged with all that is being said.
Other times, a text teaches us so clearly, and Scripture illustrates it so well, that other attempts don’t do the theme justice. I think the biblical teaching on forgiveness, and in particular the illustrative way Jesus teaches us about it, carries the day and deserves more reflection, not less.
To begin, I want to state clear, obvious truths about the dangers of not forgiving others, each escalating from the last. This isn’t for shock value, but to match the Bible’s tone when it speaks of an unforgiving spirit.
Without a forgiving spirit, you will not gain or keep any true friends.
Without a forgiving spirit, you cannot fulfill your covenant commitments in a local church, which inevitably hurts real people you profess to love and care about.
Without a forgiving spirit, your marriage will not be healthy and will deteriorate.
Without a forgiving spirit, your relationship with your children will become strained at best and estranged at worst.
Without a forgiving spirit, you cannot fulfill the two great commandments: loving God and loving your neighbor as yourself.
Without a forgiving spirit, you cannot enter the kingdom of heaven.
At stake in this fifth petition is the quality of our life now and whether we’ll spend eternity with God in the future.
This is how Scripture speaks of the importance of forgiveness. Let me support this by pointing to two passages in Matthew.
The first is right here in Matthew 6. The fifth petition, “Forgive us our debts, as we have also forgiven our debtors,” is the only petition in the Lord’s Prayer that Jesus comments on and elaborates on. Look with me at Matthew 6:14-15.
14 For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, 15 but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. (Mt 6:14–15)
This should get the attention of every Bible reader, because this is the only petition Jesus provides commentary on. Especially when the elaboration suggests some relationship between our forgiving of others and God’s forgiving of us.
The second passage I want you to think about is Matthew 18:21-35. If you remember, this is the parable of the unforgiving servant. Jesus tells this parable after Peter’s question in verse 21.
21 Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” 22 Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times. (Mt 18:21–22)
Immediately after this, Jesus tells a parable—and this is key—of the kingdom of heaven.
The parable is about a servant who owed the king an enormous amount of money. Think billions of dollars. The exact amount isn’t the point; Jesus uses such an extreme number to make it plain that no one could ever pay it back. Yet after the servant pleads for mercy, the king is moved with pity, releases him, and forgives the debt. Astonishing mercy.
This act of mercy should have filled the servant with gratitude and made him merciful. That isn’t what happens.
The servant, forgiven an enormous amount, then goes to someone who owed him much less, grabs him by the neck, demands repayment, and imprisons him when he says he can’t pay. Now listen to how Jesus concludes the parable.
32 Then his master summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. 33 And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?’ 34 And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt. 35 So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.” (Mt 18:32–35)
We cannot take this petition lightly, because the Bible simply won’t allow it.
Let’s be really clear about this connection. Forgiveness is not a work that merits God’s forgiveness. This is not cause and effect. Rather, an unrepentant, unforgiving spirit reveals a person who has never known God’s forgiveness in the gospel or been transformed by his grace.
A forgiving spirit is evidence of grace in a person’s life, whereas an unforgiving spirit is evidence of a life void of God’s transforming grace.
What is forgiveness? It might be helpful to start with what forgiveness is not. Ken Sande, in his influential book The Peacemaker, explains that forgiveness is not a feeling, forgetting, or excusing sin.
1. Forgiveness is not a feeling. We can’t think of forgiveness in terms of how we feel about the person who sinned against us or the sin they committed. Forgiveness is a decision, an act of our will about how we respond and relate to the person who has sinned against us.
2. Forgiveness is not forgetting. Sande helpfully notes that forgetting is a passive process. Thoughts fade out of our memory. Forgiveness is an active process by which we make conscious choices regarding our relationship with this person.
3. Forgiveness is not excusing sin. To forgive is not to say, “Oh, it’s really ok,” or “it’s not a big deal.” Forgiveness is agreeing with God’s assessment of the wrongness of someone’s actions and obeying God by forgiving those wrong actions.
Now that we know what forgiveness is not, let’s consider a robust definition of forgiveness from Wilhelmus A. Brakel.
“Forgiveness is a declaration to the offender proceeding from the heart of an offended party that he entertains neither hatred, aversion, nor wrath in his heart toward him, and that he will not inflict evil upon him due to his offense, but rather is inclined to live in peace and love with him.”
That definition contains so much biblical language and imagery.
Consider the following commands.
19 Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord. (Ro 12:19.)
15 See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone (1 Th 5:15)
27 “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. (Lk 6:27–28)
18 If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. (Ro 12:18)
None of these commands suggest that forgiveness gives the offender the same access to us as before, or that the relationship doesn’t change to some degree. You can forgive someone while not trusting them as you once did. That’s not unforgiveness. You can forgive and have healthy boundaries if that is necessary. Forgiveness does not require you to embrace the offender as your best friend. It is a decision not to avenge yourself and, as much as you can, to live at peace.
The Bible also conditions forgiveness on the repentance of the one who sinned against us.
3 Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, 4 and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.” (Lk 17:2–4)
There is a sin that an unrepentant person cannot be completely forgiven for. I mean you can’t fully reconcile with, or pursue a deeper relationship with, someone who won’t repent. I think John Piper is right when he says the following:
“The difference is that when a person who wronged us does not repent with contrition and confession and conversion (turning from sin to righteousness), he cuts off the full work of forgiveness. We can still lay down our ill will; we can hand over our anger to God; we can seek to do him good; but we cannot carry through reconciliation or intimacy.”
Now that we’ve thought about the gravity of this petition and the meaning of forgiveness, we can think about what it is to pray this prayer.
Praying, “forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors,” means seeking God’s pardon for our sins and the power to forgive those who’ve sinned against us.
I.) We pray for forgiveness to maintain fellowship with God
Jesus’ example prayer is one that only Christian disciples can pray. Jesus intends for Christians to pray regularly for God to forgive their debts, sins, and transgressions. We do so not becasue we fear being disowned by our Father in heaven, but to maintain the sweetness of our fellowship with him.
For the Christian, our covenant with God cannot be broken because it’s dependent on God’s faithfulness and the finished work of Jesus Christ. Our sin can disrupt the sweetness of our communion with God, so that we feel as if he is absent from us. Our conscience burdens us, so we lack temporary comfort in our communion with the Lord.
Listen to how David describes his feelings before confessing and repenting of his sin before the Lord.
3 For when I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. 4 For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was dried up as by the heat of summer. 5 I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the LORD,” and you forgave the iniquity of my sin. (Ps 32:3–5)
We seek the Lord’s forgiveness daily because we know that until glory, sin will still hinder us, not glorify God, and run contrary to the gospel we’ve been called to walk in. Those who’ve tasted and seen that the Lord is good want to bring before God anything and everything that attempts to spoil their enjoyment of that goodness.
10 If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us (1 Jn 1:10)
What truths do we need to remember when we are tempted to not confess and seek God’s forgiveness?
1. We should seek God’s forgiveness because of the character of God.
6 The LORD passed before him and proclaimed, “The LORD, the LORD, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness, 7 keeping steadfast love for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin (Ex 34:6–7)
For you, O Lord, are good and forgiving, abounding in steadfast love to all who call upon you. (Ps 86:5)
2. We should seek God’s forgiveness because of God’s promise.
9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness (1 Jn 1:9)
3. We should seek God’s forgiveness because of the priestly ministry of Jesus.
My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous (1 Jn 2:1)
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II.) We pray for the power to forgive to maintain fellowship with others
Two guarantees in your life make Jesus’ teaching here essential.
The First is that you’re going to sin, and the second is that you’re going to be sinned against. That harms you, your relationships, and the communities you inhabit together. We pray for the power of forgiveness to maintain our relationships and seek the good of the communities we live in.
We seek this in prayer, because the power of forgiveness comes not from us but from God. If forgiveness were strictly up to us, we’d choose to stay bitter and angry. Forgiveness from the heart overflows from a heart changed by God’s forgiveness.
31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. 32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. (Eph 4:31–32)
III.) We pray to forgive as we have been forgiven by God
No matter how we are sinned against, God is not calling us to forgive a greater debt than we owed Him because of our sin. God has shown us abundant grace by forgiving every terrible thought, every wicked word, and every damning deed.
For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; 12 as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us. (Ps 103:11–12)
This great act of forgiveness shapes and forms us into forgiving, merciful people.
12 Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. (Col 3:12–13)
How can we who’ve been forgiven so much forgive so little?
